Everyone hates those pesky calls which try to sell you products (I was being generous.. they try to force products down our throats). There are many ways to deal with them. Either you can go the way Xylene suggests or do it my way
(to be honest I got it as a forward.. damn my conscience!)
1 After the telemarketer finishes speaking, ask him/her to marry you. — Oh thanks for calling.. I was feeling so lonely in life after my GF met me.. sob sob.. I need somebody in life.. I have everything in life money, car a job… Will you marry me? (In case she says yes, its your turn to hang-up!)
2. Tell the telemarketer you are busy at the moment, and ask him/her, if he/she will give you his/her home phone number so you can call him/her back.
3. Ask them to repeat everything they say, several times. — Eh what I didn’t understand.. can you explain it again..
4. Tell them it is dinnertime, BUT ask if they would please hold. Put them on your speaker phone while you continue to eat at your leisure. Smack your food loudly and continue with your dinner conversation. — Oh thats a great plan really.. smack.. slick.. Wow the paratha is owesome.. can I have some more butter pls…. and lassi too.. (I prefer northy stuff for dinner)
5. Tell them that all business goes through your agent, and hand the phone to your five year old child.– ga ga ga ga goo goo ga ga
6. Tell them your hearing is weak and that they need to speak up…. louder… louder… louder! — Hello HELLo… Can you be louder pls.. hello…
7. If they start out with, “How are you today?”, say “I’m so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems…. ……… ”
8. Tell them to speak very slowly because you want to write every word down. So.. t-h-e plaaan ccooveers.. aaaall paternal.. eh how do I spell paternal?
9. Cry out in surprise, “Helen, is that you? I’ve been hoping you’d call! How is the family?” When they insist they are not Helen, tell them to stop joking. This works especially well if the telemarketer is really MALE.
10. Tell the ICICI call centre guy to call on your office number (ehm.. low battery.. I like ur plan.. if only you could call me in..) – and give him the HSBC call centre number. (CHUP-chap favourite!! 😀 )
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