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chupchap family

Fuck it

Why is it so difficult to talk about lost love and depression that follows without sounding like a teenager? As adults we are all expected to “deal with our emotions”, but what if writing such posts is a way to do that? Never mind.

The toughest part of being divorced is not knowing what to do afterwards. The worst part is sleeping alone. It’s fucking depressing. I listen to music or watch YouTube videos till I sleep out of fatigue. I can no longer lie down peacefully and slide into sleep.

Some have suggested that I should try dating . I’m not even sure how I would go abut it. I tried Tinder; not one match till now. Just the thing you need when your morale is low. App is now ignored and the dating plan has been shelved.

Now I just talk to people and try to meet some I did not know before. I used to do this in Bangalore to some extant. Not sure when, but I stopped doing it. Not sure why either. Such meetings help to an extant. It keeps me distracted and I feel less lonely overall. I guess I can replace love with new friendships.

Relationships are tough as it is and it doesn’t help when most of my existing friends are also friends with N. A couple of them have full cut me off as well, I’m not sure how I should feel about all this as of now.

/endRant. Putting on fake smiley face.